HOW SHOULD A PERSON ENTER HIS HOME?
Submitted by Mohammed Gilani on
Our Sheikh Daamat Barakaatuhum says that when a person comes home, he should come cheerfully and happily. When a worldly person returns home, he rubs his eyes before entering. He makes it red to show the family that he is very upset. He raises his voice and shouts indicating that no one should come close to him, the children must be kept away from him. He enters in his room and bangs the door. This is not the way at all. When a Deeni person enters his home, he holds an extra-long Tasbeeh. He closes his eyes whilst reciting “Subhanallah”. This is not the manner of entering the house. Also, this is not the time for one to make Zikr. One should engage in his Zikr at a later stage. When entering home, one should be cheerful, make Salaam to the members of the family. When a man enters the house in this manner, Allah Ta'ala looks at that house with mercy.
The second thing a person should do is control his language. If someone has done something incorrectly, then explain the wrong that he had done. Sometimes, a person did not commit a wrong, we get the wrong idea. We thought that our child did something wrong but it was not our child, it was another child. A person had carried out a certain act which was wrong according to you. Find out from the person as to why was this action carried out. For example, if the wife has done something, find out why she has done it? Perhaps, it was for your well-being yet you do not understand. She doesn’t understand the wrong that she has done. What problems do misconceptions lead to? Due to ambiguity and confusions huge accidents have taken place. This is due to misunderstanding which is a terrible thing. So find out, is this the person that carried out the action? Why did he do it? Show him the right way of doing it or how would you like it to be done. Sometimes we do not clarify and mention what is required by us. We expect things to be done.
Normally, we lose our top, start swearing and shouting yet a person doesn’t even know that he has done wrong. The family doesn’t pay any attention to what is been said. They just say that the old man has lost his head again and he is screaming and shouting. This is his old habit. From this we learn that upbringing, nurturing our children, wives, workers in a correct manner should be from the very beginning. Nurturing the wife is from the first day of marriage. We start off with one week of honeymoon wherein we spoil everything and we then want to correct things. When we get married, in the first week we put our feet in the wrong shoes. We start everything in the wrong way. How many people spoil their children? When they have been spoilt totally, we then say that we do not know what went
wrong with the child. When the child is small, we spoil the child due to excessive love for the child. We should love our children but it does not mean that we spoil the child.